My Hairdryer Blows...only cold air.

My track record with hairdryers over the last five years has not been stellar. I blame this solely on Scott. Before I met him, I had the same hairdryer for about six years. Since we have been married, I have now been through three. He takes responsibility for this with some skepticism.

Hairdryer #1

This one made me afraid for my life. With no warning or complaints from the appliance, I was shocked to have sparks flying right at my face. Maybe this was the dryers way of warning me to move it away from my flammable hair because the sparks were directly followed by a flame. Yes, a FLAME. It shot out at me and was about three to four inches long. My reflex was to drop the unit on the ground. However, it's funny how quickly your mind reacts in those moments. I thought better of it, not wanting my bathroom rug to catch on fire. So instead I kept the flaming object in my flammable hand while I unplugged it. This is not the first time I have used my supple hand to keep fiery objects from setting other flammable things aflame. While at Bath and Body Works, a incense burner caught fire. A customer calmly told me, your wall is on fire. Uh, ok. I went towards the glow while my other employee went towards the extinguisher. The burner was almost completely engulfed and I was concerned the shelving was about to go. Once again, my mind went quickly. I heal, the building does not. Not to mention the hundreds of people in the mall that were in danger. I then very dumbly picked it up by the plate it was on and set it in the tile floor. After it was over I noticed how scorched the wall and shelving was. In the end, I think I made the right decision. But I digress.

Hairdryer #2

This one I purchased in full wet head fashion about twenty minutes after the flame incident. I was proud because it was pink. Pink for breast cancer. My near death experience was not in vain, a few more dollars of research went forth. This one I had for about six months when for no reason it went on hiatus and has yet to return. The button moved, but nothing happened. I checked the outlet, made sure the little red button in the other bathroom was reset. It never again turned on. It was a pretty pink dryer, but that's about all it had going for it.

Hairdryer #3

This one was a chrome model, nice and shiny. It felt very professional. It has been in my possession for about four months. A couple months in it started making a rattling noise. But we were already past the point of no returns, so I just dealt with it. Then a few weeks ago, the temperature button didn't want to go all the way up to hot anymore, but I could still get it to blow hot air. And I just dealt with it. But alas, today was no go. It refused to expel anything more than room temperature air. This caused my normal ten minute drying session to stretch to forty five minutes. I know! The result is a very bad hair day. Flat, limp, stuck to my face hair day. I cannot deal with that.

So in the end, I will be purchasing a new model. No more Revlon, Hot Tools, or Conair. I am not sure what brands are left to choose from. Whatever I end up with, I won't expect it to run longer than two months.